Chibuzor looked up from his HTC Fire and pushed up the sleeves of his tartan dress shirt, exposing the tiny tattoo of a Buddha on the inside of his wrist. He rubbed it over a few times and smiled. It was quite the conversation starter. He looked over to the Pizza Inn stand at the slightly round fair-skinned girl in the mini sundress and a chignon atop her head conversing with the counter attendant, his eyes settling on her behind. He loved her behind, wanted his hands around it again.

As if on cue, she turned with a grin and made her way towards him, carrying a tray filled with a cold pizza, a shawarma roll and a medium tub of ice-cream. Chibuzor frowned; the stupid girl was never going to lose any of that extra weight if she kept eating like she was pregnant. She sat beside him on the green plastic chair and set the tray flush between them.

“Xhiz, I know you said you didn’t want anything but I didn’t want to eat alone.” 

Chibuzor gave a defeated smile. “Okay Louise, I’ll have half the pizza, even though its cold and I don’t know why any rational human being would willingly subject themselves to cold pizza.”

Louise rolled her eyes. “Urgh! Shut up!”

She fished out the plastic knife rolled up in a wad of tissue and cut up the pizza crust into two equal halves. Chibuzor let her feed him his half, laughing as some of the juices spilled on to his chin, She offered to lick it off, the need in her eyes amused him. He brought his face towards her and surprised her with a kiss as she leaned in to lick his chin. For someone inexperienced she kisses really well, Chibuzor thought to himself as he deepened the kiss and gently pushed his tongue between her teeth. He noticed the woman at the adjacent table begin to raise an eyebrow and in response he reached down and put his hand around Louise’s waist. She opened her eyes and slapped his hand away.

“Chibuzor, what are you doing?”

“I don’t know, just wanted feel you pressing against me.”

“Pffft! My mom’s friends come here a lot. You want to put me in trouble?”


Louise playfully smacked his arm. “Forget what I said. Let’s to go to the Hub, I want to get the new Sefi Atta book.”

They pushed off their chairs and Louise swiped her ice-cream tub off the tray, leaving her half of the pizza and the shawarma untouched as they made their way out. He held himself from saying something snarky but sometimes Louise was terrible at reading the room.

 Xhiz took in the crowd at the lobby of the Genesis Cinemas as he led Louise up on to the landing that served the upper floor.. It skewed young, with petite girls in bum shorts and wavy weaves and boys all decked out in neon YMCMB tee-shirts and those annoying carrot pants they all seemed to wear. Tuesdays were half off, there could be no other explanation. Everyone and their houseboy came to Genesis on Tuesdays. Xhiz spotted a black thatch of hair with a green streak and ducked into the relative safety of the magazine rack as the head turned in their direction. His eyes darted to Louise who was staring at the new releases shelf, oblivious to what just happened. Slowly so he didn’t spook her, he suggested they check out the gadgets on the back shelves, using the shelving to shield them from the guy with the green streak. He leaned over every now and then to watch for the guy as she browsed through the products. He didn’t relax until he noticed green streak stroll out and walk down the stairs, a gaggle of brightly dressed fashion boys cackling behind him.

Chibuzor dropped the book whose blurb he’d been pretending to read and tapped Louise.

“L.J, They don’t have the Atta book in stock yet and it’s almost three, your driver must be bone tired of waiting.”

Louise gasped. “Poor Musa! I don’t think he’s had anything to eat all day. Let’s go.”

They stopped off at the Biggs stand at the food court and got Louise’s driver a burger and coke. They also made a quick detour for a brick of credit vouchers for Louise’s mom at the newly launched Etisalat store before heading out of the Palms through the second exit. They strolled to her car hands intertwined and hugged tightly before he helped her five foot five frame into the SUV.

She wound down her window, poked her head out and stared deeply into his eyes.

“A kiss before I go, Frendie?”




Saanyol ¯..(•͡.̮ •͡ )../¯  





Isn’t one ping enough? 

Saanyol ¯..(•͡.̮ •͡ )../¯  

Well who knows, you might still be high from swallowing that one’s spit, again.


Fuck off abeg.

Saanyol ¯\..(•͡.̮ •͡ )../¯  

Hoin! Abeg I’m not the one who told her not to finish her food.

Saanyol ¯..(•͡.̮ •͡ )../¯  

Which brings me to my next rational thought, you hate that she’s fat and you hate that she doesn’t finish her food. Which one you dey?


Urgh!  My batt’s almost dead and I’m trapped in traffic.

Saanyol ¯..(•͡.̮ •͡ )../¯  

They didn’t drop you off today? :O Perhaps your novelty’s wearing off.


 Saan. Fuck you.

Saanyol ¯..(•͡.̮ •͡ )../¯  

 VN 1200281 sent


The photographer’s voice echoed in the massive hall.

“Lean forward, tilt your head to the left, a little more, excellent!”

The dress rode up to just an inch of her crotch as she held the pose and Tariebi fought the urge to pull the hem down. This was why she hated young designers, their clothes were always so impractical and… Gaga-esque. Too bad, because none of the people who could afford the price tags they slapped on their ‘couture’ would ever even look at them. This one was one of the more unimaginative ones, Haus Of Chreez, WTF was that? So because his name was Chris he had to have a Haus of Chreez? Fucking idio…


A shriek came from the back of the hall followed by the hurried clicking of heels. Tariebi broke her pose immediately she realised it was Kikelomo. She groaned; she could always trust that one to make an entrance. She weaved through the smattering of wires and studio lights and climbed onto the stage to give Tari a hug. She hugged and held on tight, her butt in full view of the entire photography crew. She finally detached and openly ogled the half dressed male model that Tari had been posing with.

“Tariebi, you’re like the worst friend ever!” Kike wailed. “So you had a photo shoot in Unilag, right here in Multipurpose Hall and you didn’t even tell me? Especially when you knew this hottie would be here with you?”

Tariebi hissed. “Well you’re here now and you’re interrupting. You can watch if you want, we’ll gist when I’m done.”

Tariebi could swear she heard someone mutter “Ouch! See ela!”

Kikelomo laughed nervously and began to make her way out. “No need, I have a class in like twenty minutes. Ping me when you’re done?”



Tariebi Sayani Red Models 


Tariebi Sayani Red Models

Babes, just finished with the shoot, where you dey?

UniLaGs FinEsT <3 <3

Couldn’t wait, Saanyol came to pick me up.

Maybe some other time, when you don’t have a massive photo shoot. So you don’t have to ignore and humiliate me? <3

Tariebi Sayani Red Models

*Sigh* Kike, I’m sorry.

UniLaGs FinEsT <3 <3

Tariebi, don’t apologise. TTYL. :*


Tariebi sighed as she put her phone on silent and pushed into the small carry on she’d brought for the shoot. She wasn’t in any mood for small talk. Kike knew how to push everyone’s buttons and even though it was hard to admit, she’d dismissed Kike far too rudely. It was worse because of the crew were Unilag students and before long, the gist would get onto Twitter. Good thing she kept her account private and ruthlessly curated her followership.

She pulled the strap of the carry on onto her shoulder and walked over to the clothes rack where the other model was straightening out his dress shirt.

“Josh. I don step be dat oh. Abi make I wait you, make we waka together?”

Josh smiled. “No worry oh Tari, I suppose stay back help Dolapo pack up.”

“Oh okay.” Tari extended her hands out for a quick hug. “Hopefully we go see soon for another shoot. Bye.”

Kike watched from inside the cab she usually used whenever Saanyol called. He was waiting but she wasn’t worried, he was probably already angry anyway. She slunk low immediately she noticed Tariebi exit the Multi-purpose hall in pink sweat pants and a hoodie. The girl knew her body looked good in anything she wore and she took every opportunity to flaunt said body. Her phone buzzed. Another DM from Saanyol asking how far away she was. He only resorted to DM’s when he was horny. She wasn’t, so he’d have to wait.

Kike lit up in a smile when she noticed the side exit doors open again and two guys walk out. One was the model she’d noticed at the shoot. She watched him help the other guy, probably the photographer pile equipment into the backseat and wave as the first put his car into gear and drove off. Then the model guy started walking towards the main gate. Kike tapped the driver and pointed.

“That’s who we we’re waiting for.”

The driver nodded and started the engine and slowly eased out of his parking space and into the road. They slowed beside the model.

“Hey, you’re the guy from Kike’s photo shoot right?” Kike called from the backseat, feigning surprise.

The model stopped and rubbed his skinned head. “Oh! Hey! You’re the friend?”

Kike smiled and opened the door facing him. “Need a lift?”

“Sure.” He replied after a moment’s hesitation and climbed in.

“Where exactly are you headed?”


“OMG!!! I’m going to Ikeja, we could totally drop you off.”


“Errr… What’s your name? Don’t want to be rude and keep calling you ‘Hey’.”

“Hahahaha! It’s Josh.”

“Okay, I’m Kike.”

“Nice to meet you Kike.”

“Same here.”

“So Josh, please do you mind if we take a quick picture. No one will believe me if I tell them I shared a cab with a top male model.”

“Haha! I’m not a top model yet oh, but no problem.”

“Okay, can you please take it with your Bold 5, it has flash and takes better pictures.”

“No problem.”

“Okay can you please send all three pics to me?”

“Is your Bluetooth on?”

She hid the bluetooth icon from her screen, turning away her phone so he couldn’t see.

“Nope, my Bluetooth’s bad, my pin’s 2254A854. Add me up and send it via BBM?”

“Okay, I’ll drop off here. Thanks for everything Kike, right?”

She smirked, “Yup. Bye.”



Saanyol was waiting outside his gate wearing only a tee-shirt and basketball shorts as the cab ground to a halt and Kike alighted. He all but threw the fare at the driver, and stalked back into his house without uttering a word to his girlfriend. She rolled her eyes and followed. She mounted the stairs to the guest house, he’d left the door ajar for her.  She closed the door behind her and picked up the shirt he taken off and thrown on the floor and pushed the bedroom door open. He was perched on the edge of the bed, scrolling on his Bold 5. He turned the phone to her, and gave a bitter laugh. She snatched the phone out of his hands and tried unsuccessfully to delete the picture of her and Josh that was now his wallpaper.

“You both look so good together, taking pictures in the cab I’m paying for. Aren’t you just the cutest couple?”

Kike grimaced. “I thought you unfollowed? Why won’t you just grow up and take down that Tweetdeck tab you have on me?”

He sprung off the bed and grabbed her arm, putting his mouth close to her ear.

“Because you make it incredibly hard for me to trust you.”

“I’m here aren’t I?” Kike replied, and slipped her hand into Saanyol’s pants.

He gasped. “Yes, yes you are.”

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